Tirades...

Looks like I need to do some explaining.  Alright, I get that.  I come on here, I'm screaming at the internet, at Frap, at Shelby, at whoever will listen.  I'm calling out righteous fury on anything that moves.  I think it's obvious.

I'm pissed.  Yeah, I'm still upset.  I mean, you can't see it, it's not like I'm shaking uncontrollably, and seeing red, or anything.  I just...well, I thought I had a destiny, you know?  I saw my chance, my chance to be somebody stolen away from me, by a monster that didn't even show up for a fight.  He wasn't there that night...god...that night....

I'm sorry about a lot of things I've said, and done lately.  I'm sorry that I fell into this horrid mauldin persona I called Remnant, as in 'what is left of a man when you strip away his pride?"  I need to clear something up first before I continue.  Remnant is not some multiple personality of me,  I just...I just got all depressed.  I was so... sure that I would have died, that my death could've meant something.  I fell into a depression, that's it really.

So, you all are still wondering what is going on with me.  I don't remember everything that happened 'that night', but I've apparently become quite the shitty artist.

I walked into the woods that night, after the monster...the Slender Man no-showed my huge event, my grand ambush, my chance for redemption.  I shouldn't have been surprised.  I hadn't seen him since he killed Amelia.

God, I.

I was in there, searching for him, I needed to do this, to fight him, to get in one shot, before I died.  The story could've come true, if I could just...  In the forest, I saw bodies.  I'm not certain who, but they hung from the branches above me.  I screamed out for him, I called him everything in the book.  I saw

a tree

and this tree was alone from the others.  It was vastly different, it has this...presence to it, as if it were different.  Bodies of...of people I knew were impaled upon it, their inn...fuck...

Their guts were just hanging out...god.  So many dead...it just..it was just so huge, and so tall

It had to have been visible outside the forest, so many dead, hanging off of it.  And then it moved.

The tree moved, just a little.  It's bark shifted.  I felt this...this weight crash down onto me, and fell to the ground.  My vision twisted around as if I was spinning in a freefall.  Darkness surrounded me, the light of the blood moon faded to a mote in the distance.  I felt my heart pounding loudly in my chest, as I gasped for breath, for purchase.  That fear, his fear started to overtake me as it had before so many times.  I suddenly heard not a single sound as I struggled to my feet, using that crappy sword of mine as a crutch.  Color drained out of my vision, the silence was replaced by rushing water, as I stumbled towards the tree, wavering.  I knew my heart had stopped beating, even as I swung at this malevolence, hoping to myself that I could accomplish something before I died.

The tree bled.

That...
that fucking tree bled as I collapsed on my side.  The blood glistened in that pale light, that tiny speck of light that was the blood moon. 

I awoke, sitting on a fallen tree, my head in my hands, having vomited and cried until I had nothing left to give...yet there was a difference in me.  I...I felt different, I had begged God, or whoever was out there to help me, and it had happened.  I was saved from this...horrid, evil thing that was the Bleeding Tree. 

So the long sojourn out of that hell that was the forest began.  I entered a clearing where the moon shone down upon me, and suddenly things were so clear to me.  I realize now that I had a vision.  That was what was so important about the Solstice, I had to be there to hear those thoughts.  There was a need that I was chosen to fulfill. 

Its hard to explain really this need, I weep when I think of it.  The idea of killing these people, you Runners, you Fighters, whatever the hell title you take.  I succumbed to this concept a week or so ago, when I wrote...I wanted to justify myself, calling itself a 'sacred call'.  I raged against everyone I knew, so I could feel better about myself and my task, knowing that it is God's work.

I...I just know that if I were to kill enough Runners...and take a bone from your bodies, that eventually, this will work out.  But who could do such a terrible act?  How could I kill someone I swore to protect?  I mean I have to trust in people, in the truth, right? I weep every time I think of what I am compelled to do.

Such...such horror to contemplate.  I know I'm still a man, I know, I'm not some proxy scum.  Those are the people I want to kill, the ones that have infiltrated and corrupted us, I'll take this...this evil task onto myself if I must to save the innocents.  The blessed innocents.

So please trust in me a little longer.

And don't worry that I'm going to start killing Runners.




For I have already started.

plethora of dismay

i notice that so many

people are so fearful



guilty consciences?


to clear

a few

things up

i know who i am

i understand i have

well

some anger

issues


sometimes i forget

like with will

sorry


but you trusted

me before

why cant you

trust me now

A thousand burning suns

Sinners,

Traitors,

Conspirators.

How weak as a people are you now?  I have marveled at how many of you have been cowed so easily by the damned.  Making your deals,  easy exits, now you forget everything you came across.  That is HIS victory, foolish sheep.  An inch backwards is a loss.  You don't understand what you are doing when ground is conceded! 

Of course it falls upon me to solve this.  Your hero, your salvation.  There is a serious amount of amputation needed, righteously done, not in punishment, but in treatment.  A surgeon mains, slices, and peels in the name of healing.

So will I.

I will find my destiny, my glory that was denied.. DENIED by those of you who failed to wish.  FAILED, FAILED to want him dead.  How could you? How could you want him alive?  What sort of sick penance do you seek that only he can give?

You deserve him,  for all your secrets and lies.  And that just makes me want to destroy him and his agents even more.  No redemption, no forgiveness.

I will find those of you who have succumbed.

I will give you a merciful end.

And then

I will carve my glory from your bones

and take your tainted soul, as a step towards my destiny.

And you all wanted me to do this.  So I shall.

to up the stakes

since i have some control over

a certain photobucket account

i will give you another riddle

to maybe shed light

on my truth


The poet remarked to the philosopher, "So what do you regret?"  The wise man snorted, "Never took to regret.  All things must be weighed in the moment."

the authors formatting

very good kay


yes the blog entry i referred to

the last post zerosage

made

is improper

he did not write it

the smilies

the indentations

center formatting


he does none of those things

he let someone

else write it


because he was scared

to say goodbye

traitors in our midst

i have been influenced lately

i can tell

ive thought more about what

i want to be



a silly thing

destiny

i wanted to have one

i failed

and now what is left

what is given to a man

who was robbed of

who he wanted to be

of what he meant to be



admittedly

i am a lying sack of shit sometimes

other times not as much


the point i offer today

is that there are traitors among

us


those who have worked with

darkness

monsters

and those who have been

influenced by the same

they are polluted

corrupted



and it falls on me

to destroy them

i will play the villain

for a bit longer

to find our peace


also

no more pictures

you did not solve my riddles

so your entertainment is at an end

perhaps someday


a sad remnant